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Sunday, September 11, 2016

Irritating Day.......

Today is a beautiful Sunday but I must have woke up on the wrong side of the bed:
1. At breakfast, I am irritated by my husband many questions.
2. After breakfast, he confronts me regarding my anger prone irritability.
3. "Because you think I have all the answers to all your questions." comes my defensive answer. "We have all the same source of information which is the facebook. I don't know everything."
4. But I do feel sorry for getting irritable though. I know it is my fault. In any case, I just do not like my husband to depend too much on me. He has been like that recently, asking for my consent and letting me do most of our family and or personal decisions for him. I have been his source of family information too and I just want him to be more independent. I just so want him to be more physically and mentally alert and capable.
5. Today is Sunday. We arrive church about 15 minutes before the mass. But the parish church this morning is just simply too noisy. Inside the church, I try to pray. I am all trying to tapper down my temper after that short spat with my husband. I need so much to control myself emotionally and spiritually. But how can anybody pray with such a din!
6. Then Anita Yu, coming from her chit-chat all around the church, sits down infront of me and my husband. "Hi kumusta?! Kumusta na?" She bubbly and loudly greets me. I put a finger to my mouth to hush her loud social greetings. She does not get my gesture and continues  with "How many grandchildren do you have already?" I try very hard to smile and answer her with my two fingers. (Meaning two.) But she can not seem to get it still. "Why, you lost your voice?" She asks. In any circumstances, it could have been comical, but I am not feeling any cheery this morning. Again I make a 'hush hush' gesture with my finger over my mouth and say softly. "I am praying." But she continues to be dumbfounded. Oh my, doesn't she ever know that this is a church?!
7. During the mass, during the 'peace' greeting, Anita Yu avoids me. I think she is clueless and must have been offended. Sometimes I come out harshly snobbish. So now I have do some damage control....oh my! 
8. After the mass, I tap her shoulder and say. "I did not answer you awhile ago because I was praying."...."Oh sorry, I thought you lost your voice." She reply.
9. After the mass, Mrs. Lily Uy and her family invite the parishioners to a brunch at the social hall in thanksgiving for her recovery from her illness. She was hospitalized twice very recently from cough and fever, and from hypoglycemia. The Cardinal Quevedo is present for the occasion, and as usual I have observed the center stage being hugged by the ever attention seeker devorah tan-abing at church and at social gatherings. Infact I call her "Ms Presidential table" in contrast to "Ms presidentiable" to myself, because she is ever ready at the presendential table with the dignitaries. Well, maybe sour graping on my part because she is that rich and popular. But honestly I just hate it when people accost her with such nobility, even our parish priest and the cardinal himself. When the cardinal approaches our table, I stand up and kiss his ring with reverence. Others shake his hand and many other ladies hug him and make beso beso (pecking of the cheek). I kind of get pissed off with this kind of familiarity. Hey ladies, he is the cardinal, do you know that?
9. Before going home, I realize I lost my folding umbrella. Geez, I just can not recall where I misplace it.
10. Arriving home, my maid asks permission to sleep out tonight. I am doubly agitated. I scold her. "This will be the last time you're going t ask to sleep out. I am not going to permit you the next time."  
11. I hope and pray that the day will not get any worse. 
12. Despite everything, a blessed Sunday to you all.  

Updates: I am able to retrieve my lost umbrella. I left it inside the church.

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

This Month of September 2016

This September 2016 ushers in an auspicious month, with September 1st, officially ending the so called 'ghost month' coming from the Chinese traditional belief based on the lunar calendar. In the Philippines, it is the start of the 'Ber' months where Christmas carols are beginning to be heard all over the radio, malls, offices and at homes. I booked my plane tickets at the Philippine airline office, and I joyfully heard my first Christmas carols this September 1st.

September 5 this year is the 37th birthday of my youngest son Emil Gabriel. Somehow this year is a turning point of his career life. He left his good paying job at Ayala Land two months ago to look for a career changing business opportunity. And Emil has finally chosen to go back to Cebu this September 7 to work at Cebu Service Parts, a company partly owed by the Tan (LCT) family. My heart is disturbed that he is leaving the secured family abode in Manila and is leaving his girl friend temporarily behind in Manila as well. Besides I don't entirely know his ultimate plan at all and I am deeply anxious about his career and love life. I have a lot of concern for him to be successful in his chosen field of work and of his future endeavors. I also want him to get married and have a family of his own, if only his girlfriend is strong and healthy enough for such a life long task......I worry so much for him because his paths to me seem so indefinite. O God please help him! Have mercy and bless him, O Lord!

I worry about my daughter Martha Lauren as well. She is left alone in Manila, although thankfully Sui Ling the girlfriend of Emil is staying with her at home. Martha is so simple and quiet that she does not attract boys. She is smart but guys seem to be intimidated by her intelligence. She is of age but is still single. I don't want her to be alone all her life. I am so much concerned about her in this regard.  I pray that the Lord will be kind and bless her with the future right man of her life. So I constantly pray for her, and for all of my other children too.

Getting back to one of the many blessed days this September was the canonization of Mother Teresa of Calcutta on September 4. On this special occasion, I beseeched that she pray for this family and all my children to our Father in heaven above.

Today is another beautiful day. Today September 8 is the birthday of the mother of our Savior. Our Blessed Mother has many titles. I venerate her as my 'Mother of Perpetual Help', 'Immaculate Virgin Mary', 'Immaculate Conception', 'Our Lady of Lourdes', 'Our Lady of Mount Carmel', 'Queen of Heaven and Earth', 'Queen of Angels', 'Queen of Peace', 'Help of Christians', 'Queen of the Family', and 'Queen of our Homes'. This morning, my husband and I attended the first mass at our parish church, the priest Father Charlie Celeste gave a beautiful sermon. It touched my heart. The context was something like......Our redemption begun when Mary gave her "YES" to God to be the mother of our Savior. During those times, it was a nightmare for this young girl to be pregnant without a husband. It was a nightmare too for Joseph to be bethroded to a pregnant woman whose baby was not his own. But God spoke to them through an angel and the angel said "BE NOT AFRAID." ...TRUST IN THE LORD....HAVE FAITH IN GOD ALWAYS! ........Thank you O blessed Mother! You know, in my heart I know this homily was meant for me too,.... this homily was meant for me!....and I shall not be afraid!

Thank you my God! 
For all my concerns, I will not be afraid. I will trust in the Lord. I will have faith in you always. Thank you so much!